“Beliefs are conclusion derived from information and experience. Beliefs can be both conscious and subconscious”, Rob Williams
We cannot really see the world as it is. We see it as we are.
Beliefs divide you from the reality. Are the definitions that you give of your world. Rob Williams, originator of Psych-k technique, says that are the conclusions that we express about something (our personality, the goodness of a brand, the effect of medicines or drugs…). You make it after receiving a series of informations or experiences about certain events. If when you was a child, you got burn by a flame and you felt pain, you’ll believe that being burn by a flame could be dangerous for your body.
It is good for you to know it. You see that something have a certain effect and you learn from it. You’ll probably get right about the fire. But sometimes you set down conclusions not based on physical phenomenons and rational causalities. And in this case some problems can occur.
Let’s take an example with two random guys. Tim and John have been invited separately from a friend of them at a party. When they arrive they know none in the the place and their friends are both away. After a while Tim starts speaking with people around him, and in half an hour they are still together laughing and having fun. He then goes dancing with some people just met, and all the night he speaks a lot, meeting many new people. He feels awesome and brilliant. He feels like being in one of the best parties of his life. On the contrary we have John. After going around for a while, looking for his lost friend, he sits down at one side of the room, eating the buffet food, and watching bored around, waiting for something to happen.
The place is the same, the conditions of the two persons invited at the party are the same, but Tim reacted in one way and John in another, and the results is very different.
They probably have a different attitude against the same event. They would have a different story, a diverse set of previous experiences and they couldn’t have the same environmental conditions. Tim probably thinks different things about himself than John does. He would probably believe to be funny and brilliant, to be a good speaker and friend, also with people just met. On the other side John would probably think something like: “This party is boring”;”I don’t know anyone”;”Where is that bas***d that invited me?”;”They don’t like me” etc…
Really different, isn’t it?
Don’t judge which of the two behaviours is better than the other. They are both right about their convictions, that’s the point. Tim believe to be in a great place, and actually he is. John believe to be at a boring party, and actually for him the party it is boring. Conclusions that you give about a situation make the situation to be different at least at our eyes.
And where does this convictions comes from? It is probably a mix of many factors and in this article I’ll try to explain some of the main.
In his best selling book, “Unlimited power“, Anthony Robbins, distinguisch five factors that determs in what we believe:
-(1)Environment: A successfull environment generate success, a happy environment generate happiness. The opposite is also true. A failing and depressing environment generate failure. My professor of statistic made me notice that, when a person lose his/her job, if others around him/her lose it too, he is less willing to fight for finding better conditions. The environment in which you live push you to live with certain standards. The persons whit which you stays all the day, influence strongly your attitude toward life. Sharing depression whit other depressed people doesn’t help you to escape from it. Living as lively and happy people will do it. But sometimes we lack of appropriate models. And we just learn what is in front of our eyes every day.
-(2)Events and (3)Previous experiences: The process of learning through experience is a very useful machine that help us to react faster to life’s situations. As in the example of the fire. As soon as you discover that fire can be painful, you would consider it dangerous.
“The best way for create the conviction of being able to do something, is doing it at least one time. If that time you manage to do it, it will be easier to create the conviction of being able to do it again” Anthony Robbins
Furthermore there are days that are impressed in your mind. That day you where so great or so bad that you were able to shake your beliefs system. A friend of mine used to remember the day in which he did sky diving as the day in which his life changed. He could feel the adrenaline in his body and all the energy and the fear mixed together in an exciting cocktail. In his opinion, if he was able to do that, nothing could have stop him anymore.
-(4)Knowledge: “pen is mightier than the sword” Edward Bulwer-Lytton
In the past and still now, knowledge was feared as one of the most dangerous of all the weapons. Is the alternative to experience. Nowdays we study lots of theory before starting to practise. Knowledge can offer you things that your environment lacks. Libraries are plenty of stories about other people’s lives and we can learn through it. Knowledge is one of the main road to escape from a limiting environment and difficult situations.
If you lack of convictions that gives you the confidence of doing something, you can always use your mind to experience the results in advance.
If you manage to create in your mind the precise picture of the results that you wish, representing it as already reached, you will be in a status more willing to conduct you there. Try to imagine a future event and be able to feel it as it is a present moment. Many says that we become what we think. Reconstruct and modify the interpretation of your experience, can bring you a new prospective of life and so new internal representations (the way in which you pictures your world). In the series of next posts you’ll learn more about beliefs and on how to use some techniques to change your life.
Thanks for reading.
See you soon and enjoy the next post,